The girl who is lonely

Courtney Elizabeth worthy

Title: The girl who is Lonely
 
I’m going to tell you guys a little about this Girl who Is homeschooled and she writes to herself time to time and she has a lot going in her mind she cries at night and in the morning she acts like nothing happened Last night when she walks into her church she can see people looking at her and she feels like everyone is talking about her she feels  No one they just look right though her she had Enough and she stood up in front of EVERYBODY  on a weekend and she had tears In her eyes and everybody saw that and they sat their Letting her talk and they thought that she was Wanting  Attention but she didn’t  until one day She Record her self-telling them how she really felt and It was so bad that every time she walks in they walk up to her and said sorry I didn’t know that’s how you really felt lets pray and Now she aint  inviable no more Now she can go to sleep without crying well she still does  but this is what she said    

         

        Hi You don’t know me but I know you but I go to your church and I always sit alone I cry at night because I feel like I’m worthless and useless every single one of you just look through me I’m inviable and I just had enough of this I been through so much Now and when I walk inside that church I go to well I see like No one sees me I don’t feel Loved I don’t feel welcome I just feel like I’m on a Lonely Old Rusty road in nowhere I am sitting here today Crying because I don’t what any Attention All I what is someone to listen to me and how I really Feel and every time My mom says that I can’t work yet or I can’t walk to the park and my dad to I what to learn how to live on my own and walk to the park by myself and find a job Who and where I can get a job and when I try to sing I feel judged every time even by the look on someone’s  face when I sing in front of them I can’t deal with this anymore I what to live my life the way I what to live It I what to dress the way I what to dress I what to sing the way I what to sing I what to walk the I what to walk I what to Laugh the way I what to laugh I what to smile the way I what to smile I what to do my make up the way I what to I what to Do my hair the way I what to I just what to be me in my own way and Live my life the way I what to live it I just what to Get out and get a life Have a job And do what I what to do with My body my life my style Do you know what I mean that’s what I what,  everyone Just looks at me and thinks that I’m  a bad person I what to just feel loved For me I what to go to church and feel Welcome there and See someone who don’t judge me for doing what I love and Just being me. The older I get the more I see who your real friends are and that You can’t be yourself anywhere you go it’s not fair life aint Fair but when I smile I’m crying Inside when I laugh I am hurting so much, deep down But I have a lot of Scars on my Heart that people Made and they use me for stuff If you aint my real friend then just walk away from me if you aint  my friend and I find ways to make other people happy but I never find time to make myself happy so now it’s a new start in Starting to let go of the past and moving On and Making me happy for once I might seem happy and Funny and weird but deep down I am hurting and shy and lonely deep down there is a little girl who can’t let go of the past she is in a little box () like that.  No doors no windows no light just pitch black in the box and she is scramming  and yelling for help But no answer so now she is Giving up everything so she can come out and Not be trap anymore  she was so weak now  she fell down now she got up and Brushed it off and now she is stronger than before She is herself she is mean she will push you away if she knows you’re not her friend she will start pushing you away she is moving forward now SHE is pushing everything out of her way to be herself. She doesn’t need anybody to watch over her she is strong she Do it all alone she will act like she likes you but really you can tell she hates you by her face to makes and she cries less now she don’t care what people say about her anymore she is All herself

That is what she said and she was talking about herself to so yeah it’s a sad story once you image that happing to you I been through that a lot and Now I’m in that position it sucks a lot so Never judge a shy person or anyone like that because you don’t know how it is and who they are so Start judging yourself before you judge others…

Sincerely: Courtney Elizabeth Worthy

Date: 1/10/2017

Month: January 10, 2017

Day: Tuesday

Time: 3:57

17 thoughts on “The girl who is lonely

  1. Hi Courtney,
    I’m sorry life is getting you down but it’s not a good idea to give your email address out to strangers. There are a lot of dodgy people on the internet. It’s better if they email you via your contact form which keeps your email address separate (until you respond to them).
    Even though the blogosphere seems like a nice place, you still need to be careful about what you share. Just a word of advice.
    Stay strong, always,
    Steve 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I didn’t mean to write that and i wrote that last year i just copyed and pasted it on here but thank you for letting me know I will go and take that off thank you i am sorry i forgot i putted that on their after i posted it

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I talk to people but i still think i get judged without them saying it but my one best friend who been where i am and still is i talk to her about it and Worst part is last night my sister told me that everybody says that i am doing this for attention but to my face they say they understand but she said my mom told her that i want attention That’s the worst part and oh wait no when your friend cuts and stuff and my aunt told my sister that i am doing it because my friend is and Yet again few days ago i was thinking about OD so i can get ruin of this pain and so like i said i want to go inpatient to get more help

      Like

    2. It’s sad when you’re family thinks that you want attention be hide your back but to your face they say they understand

      Like

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