Pills

People think that these pills are working,Wrong these pills are not helping to remember to smile, I still think about ending my life or cut again to get away from the pain i still feel inside, My pills are helping me sleep at night but not helping me to remember how to smile, I still fake my smile so no one knows i’m still broken and be hide my smile i am crying, I almost cried last night again And i have too more cuts on my left arm from last night at 8:30 at night. I have promised someone i will write good things about me but I can’t write good things about me Because i don’t know want’s good about me, whenever i don’t think about my past i always end up thinking about my past and want happen when i was little and with being called names i don’t know wants beautiful about me anymore i wear makeup so i can feel pretty and again when i don’t have makeup on no one really talks to me but when i have makeup on they talk to me like nothing, But the only way i get my friends attention is to put my head down on the table and cover my face up then they ask are you okay or wants wrong then i say i’m fine and when i start to say something else they ignore me like i was never their so i sit quietly and don’t say anything, It’s hard to be friends with someone you once dated and who broke you’re heart over and over again.